Getting an ADHD Diagnosis as an Adult: My Honest Experience

For a while, I couldn’t tell what was up with me. My brain was like a crowded internet browser. Too many tabs open, a bunch refusing to load, and one playing music, but I could never figure out which one. The forgotten appointments, the chronic procrastination, the way I could hyper-focus on a random project or topic deep dive but forget to pay my bills? Just stress, right? Turns out that undiagnosed ADHD had me in a chokehold!

The Breaking Point: Life Changes & Escalating Symptoms

I hit several major life transitions quickly, but I figured I’d just adjust. Instead, my undiagnosed ADHD symptoms were exacerbated. They were like, “Oh, you thought you were safe? That’s cute. Watch this.”

Suddenly, the stress from work and life wasn’t just stress.

I was drowning in meetings and deadlines. Executive dysfunction turned simple everyday tasks into impossible puzzles. I was overstimulated by everyone, everywhere. It felt like my senses were stuck at full volume, and I couldn’t find the mute button. At night, my thoughts refused to shut up. 

The "Aha" Moment: Talking to My Therapist & Friends

ADHD symptoms? Never crossed my mind. I was the organized one, the star student, the girl with the pristine all-white bedroom that stayed spotless for years. My life was built on structure, deadlines, and planners. But somewhere along the way—after hitting those back to back life transitions, life lifing, and repeatedly absorbing everyone's problems all around me… I felt like my brain started glitching.

And the worst part? I was so mean to myself. I kept asking myself, What is wrong with me? Why can’t I just push through like I used to?

Then, a few friends with an ADHD diagnosis started casually mentioning things they struggled with—and every single thing sounded like my daily life. Wait, this isn’t just me?

I hesitantly brought it up with my therapist. I thought she’d tell me it was just stress, instead, she said what I shared made sense. She encouraged me to look into it and explained what the process was like to go and get tested.

Diagnosis Day: Overwhelming Relief and Sadness 

I set the appointment and took the assessment. When the official ADHD diagnosis came in, I felt relief wash over me. Finally, an explanation and some validation! I wasn’t being dramatic. I wasn’t lazy, a failure, or “too much.” There was a real reason my brain felt like a browser with 37 open tabs.

But then came the overwhelming sadness. I thought about all the years I struggled alone, thinking I just wasn’t disciplined enough. That’s when I realized I’d been living my whole life on hard mode without even knowing it. Feeling dumb when I would get in trouble for spacing out, forgetting things quickly, and not always grasping onto something when it was taught the first time. I thought of all the times I had forced myself to power through. Not knowing that because my brain had its own unique operating system, I needed different tools, different support.

Coping, Learning, and Finding Self-Compassion

Since my diagnosis, I’m coping better. I’ve been learning more about ADHD and making small but impactful lifestyle changes to help my ADHD brain actually function in this world.

• Tweaking my diet (turns out, ignoring hunger cues and just vibing isn’t good for you).

• Creating ADHD-friendly routines that don’t feel like punishment.

• Practicing self-compassion—because some days, the brain fog wins, and that’s okay.

I’d be lying if I said every day is smooth sailing. Of course, I still have rough days. Some days are great. I follow a routine and eat when I’m supposed to. Some days I’m able to knock out a day's to-do list in 30 minutes, I move my body, and I indulge in my hobbies. Some days are wonderful and some days… well, some days all I can do is pray to keep from crying. Executive dysfunction hits like a ton of bricks, and overstimulation drains me and makes me want to hide under a weighted blanket forever. My brain still refuses to turn on some days. But I’m learning that grace is the secret ingredient to making this whole ADHD thing more manageable.

Here’s the difference: I’m no longer shaming myself for it. I’m choosing to be compassionate with myself. To celebrate the small wins. To accept that my brain works differently and that’s okay.

So if you’re reading this and nodding along, just know: You’re not alone. You’re not broken. You’re just learning to thrive in your own way. And that? That’s worth celebrating 💐.